Friday, January 1, 2010

Setting goals and the Theory of Relativity

A few weeks ago, my husband came home from work, complaining about mistakes that had been made at his company, which could very well result in the loss of hundreds of jobs. I countered with my crisis of the day which occurred when someone in the warehouse mistakenly put holographic gold glitter into the brilliant gold glitter bottle and I wasn’t sure whether or not any of that glitter had been bottled and shipped out. I know that my husband had been thinking of starting his own business for quite some time, but comparing my version of a bad day with his version of a bad day was all he needed to start making serious plans to get his business started in 2010. He’s been working the same job for 20+ years and is terrified at the thought of not having a stable income, but at some point, you have to question whether or not you are living the life you really want to live. Why should we continue to do what others want us to do, just so we can “retire” when we’re too old to appreciate the freedom?

This is the time of year that we all start making goals and plans for the New Year, and for many of us, it’s also the time of year that we start feeling guilty about not accomplishing everything we had set out to do last year. My personal goal last year was to completely pay off my credit card debt by the end of the year. Considering the amount of debt that I had from getting my business started and from a few too many years of living beyond my means, one year was truly not enough time to accomplish this goal. I did pay off over $20,000 in debt, and yet I still beat myself up over not meeting my goal. In my quest to find ways to increase income and decrease expenses, I’ve come across many stories from other people who are dealing with debt. I’ve read stories of people with $6000 in credit card debt who are considering filing for bankruptcy. And I’ve read stories of people who have hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt that they are figuring out how to pay off. So what is it that makes someone with $6000 in debt think that they have no choice but to give up and someone with $400,000 in debt think that they will get it all worked out? I am finding that the best way to explain this phenomenon is my own personal Theory of Relativity.

When I was a child, my step-father aspired to find a job where he would be paid $200 per week. This was in the mid-80’s, so it’s not like $200 went all that much further than it would today. His goal of $200 per week was chosen simply because it was more than he had ever earned in a week and it was more than his friends were earning. So basically, he was aiming for a life that was relatively better than that of his friends. The problem with his way of thinking was that he was an alcoholic and drug addict and so were his friends. He did eventually find a job that paid him $200 per week, so having met his goal; he had no further need to try to better his life. Many of us have a goal of having a relatively better life than our parents had. People who know the sort of family and life that I came from are incredulous that I could have achieved all that I have achieved. Had I chosen to set my sights on a life that was only relatively better than that of an alcoholic and drug addict, you probably wouldn’t be reading this right now.

We all have moments in life that stay with us because someone said something so profound that it changed our lives, whether you realized it at the time or not. When I was in high school, I was in foster care and would visit my great-aunt and cousins at Christmastime. I was engaged to my high school sweetheart and we had our lives all planned out. He would be a psychologist and I would be a teacher, and our combined income would eventually be around $100,000. When I proudly discussed my plans and goals with my cousin, Sharon, she said, “Well, that’s a good start…” I thought she was insane at the time. It made me think, “How much does her family earn that $100,000 was simply a start?” I was sure that $100,000 was more than anyone I knew was earning. But going back to my theory of relativity…At the time, I was in foster care with kids who were destined to be on welfare when they turned 18, the staff that took care of us were being paid minimum wage, and prior to being placed in foster care, I lived in a drug den. I knew that I could rise above where I was, but I didn’t dare to believe that I had as much potential as someone who came from a good family, and I really didn’t even have a concept of what was considered a good annual income. In that one conversation, Sharon opened my eyes to the fact that, maybe I was limiting myself in my belief of what was available to me and what I deserved in life. I still had to convince myself that life was full of infinite possibilities and that I could achieve whatever I set out to achieve, but knowing that one person did not think twice about my ability to succeed, was the spark of hope that I needed.

My new goal for this year is to finish paying off my credit card debt and to save up enough money for our family to go on a three-week vacation in Europe. To achieve my goal, I have to increase my income by 50%. When I told my husband what I needed for this year, he only paused for a moment. He said, “Two years ago, I would have considered that a crazy idea, but now….I know it’s do-able.” That’s the sort of response you really need to hear when you decide what it is that you need and want. Many of our friends and family are trapped in jobs where they can predict exactly what they will earn for the year because they work 40 hours per week and earn relatively the same amount of money as anyone else with their educational background and experience. As business owners, we have the privilege of having a flexible income. This means that we could choose to continue as we have in the past year and maybe earn slightly more than last year. Or we can radically change our business plans, step out of our comfort zone and double, triple, or infinitely increase our income.

Increasing income may not necessarily be what you need to do in order to start living the life you want. If my husband could do a job that he loved, but only earned half of what he earns now, we would consider our lives to be improved. But if you feel that increasing your income is what you need to improve your quality of life, you may need to assess your potential streams of income.
Can you increase your client base to do more gigs or get more business from your current clients? Most of us have a hard time finding gigs during the week. Send out a postcard to all of your current clients and offer them a discounted price for weekday gigs. In an effort to save money, many parents are opting to have a smaller after-school birthday party during the week, rather than having a big weekend party. There are plenty of other events such as kids’ nights at restaurants and bookstore events which are held during the week and would benefit from having a face painter entertain their guests.

Perhaps you can increase the scope of your current business. No matter how much you feel that you still need to learn, there is much that you have already learned and can share with others. Think about teaching workshops and selling supplies to your students. You probably already have everything you need to teach a class at your kitchen table. If you don’t have the money to buy supplies for resale before your class, take orders at the class so you can buy the supplies immediately afterwards. Reinvest those profits into buying more supplies for your next class. Most people will buy more if you already have the products on hand. If you have a lot of artists in your area, you could hold a jam instead of a class. You’d still have the opportunity to sell products.

Maybe you have talents that have nothing to do with face and body art. I am a rubber stamp and collage artist in my spare time. The problem is that I have very little spare time and over the years, I’ve collected enough supplies for dozens of artists. I’ve decided to start a second online business selling collage supplies. I’m also working on a few writing projects that I’ve been putting off for years.

Rather than waiting for opportunities to find us, we have to go out and find or create those opportunities. We have to completely discard the notion of what we believe that someone in our position deserves, and accept that we are worthy of anything and everything that we want from life. Surround yourself with supportive people and recognize when you need a little inspiration. I like to plug in The Secret DVD or read Chicken Soup for the Soul when I start wondering if I really can live the life of my dreams.

There are two quotes from Wayne Dyer that I’ve had printed on my computer mouse pad, and that sum up my feelings for the upcoming year:

“There is no scarcity of opportunity to make a living at what you love; there’s only scarcity of resolve to make it happen.”
“Within you is the divine capacity to manifest and attract all that you need or desire.”

I look forward to working with all of you for another year of freedom, prosperity, and living in the moment.

Love, Erika